If you’re tuning into the Vanderpump Rules season 10 reunion like some of us, you’ve probably been waiting since March to see the drama unfold. With the chatter surrounding “Scandoval” being covered by tons of news sources (yes, even the New York Times is invested), it’s safe to say the show has entered the national consciousness.
But, if you’ve been living under a rock these past few months, here’s what the drama is all about: Cast members Tom Sandoval and Ariana Madix started dating in 2015, purchasing a house together in 2019. Then Sandoval began hooking up with another cast member, Raquel Leviss, while still dating—and living!—with Madix. The truth got out, and all hell broke loose. Scandal plus Sandoval equals Scandoval. Get it?
Tonight’s reunion airs on Bravo at 9 pm EST/8 pm CST and will be released in three parts, because there’s no way to fit all that drama in a single installment. Parts two and three are scheduled to air on May 31 and June 7 respectively, also at 9 pm EST/8 pm CST. Needless to say, we’re feeling a bit on edge with both excitement and anticipation.
Whether you’re hosting a viewing party or watching from under the covers, drinking some excellent wine is the best way to lighten the mood, cut the tension and thank the television gods for these good, good times. With that in mind, in a completely unscientific manner, we paired the Vanderpump Rules cast with some of our favorite wines according to their shared traits.
Of course, the first rule of any pairing: Do what you enjoy. (Except, you know, anything unsavory behind someone’s back. Just saying.) Read on, relax and share the fun.
Ariana Madix and Champagne
Ariana needs an effervescent libation synonymous with elegance. Sure, she and Raquel (née Rachel) are both blond-ish and beautiful, but only one of these women has emerged from this mess with her reputation intact. Like a riddled bottle of Champagne, Ariana has been turned upside down but emerged with elegance and incredible grace. She should be celebrated. Cheers, Ariana!
Champagnes our reviewers are loving right now:
- Charles Heidsieck NV Brut Réserve (Champagne), 93 Points. Buy here.
- Laurent-Perrier NV La Cuvée Brut (Champagne), 90 Points. Buy here.
- Bollinger 2014 La Grand Année Brut (Champagne), 97 Points. Buy here.
James Kennedy and English Bubbles
James is the number one guy in the group and we all know it. Just like English bubbles, he’s cheeky, charming, has a crisp bite and is becoming more popular by the day. He’s better than average and not lacking in personality: His most famous line to date is “You’re a worm with a mustache.” Chef’s kiss. Also like English bubbles, James is a thrill and we’re excited to see how he develops.
English sparkling wines our reviewers are loving right now:
- Gusbourne Estate 2018 Brut Rosé Traditional Method (England), 95 Points. Buy here.
- Balfour Winery NV Balfour 1503 Classic Cuvée Sparkling (England), 94 Points. Buy here.
- Digby Fine English NV Brut Sparkling (England), 94 Points. Buy here.
Katie Maloney and Right Bank Bordeaux
Katie Maloney, a tattooed fashionista with a delightfully goth vibe, is a Vanderpump Rules veteran. For her, this season has been about navigating the drama surrounding her breakup with ex Tom Schwartz. Katie has gotten her groove back despite a bumpy road (Raquel entered the chat here as well) and started exploring new relationships. Oh, and she rocks a great Parisian-style beret, the type that pairs well with a sharp bob and moody swagger that says, “I’ve won this round.”
That’s why we’re pairing her with a silky Merlot-dominant Bordeaux from the Right Bank that’s probably seen a few things, but made a comeback. In case you haven’t heard, Merlot is back and sexier than before.
Bordeaux our reviewers are loving right now:
- Château de Sales 2020 Pomerol, 93 Points. Buy here.
- Château Tournefeuille 2020 Lalande de Pomerol, 92 Points. Buy here.
- Vieux Château Certan 2020 Pomerol, 97 Points. Buy here.
Lala Kent and NA Prosecco
Lala Kent is attention-grabbing and can pop off in a big way—just like Prosecco. Currently in the process of moving on from her own deceitful relationship, Lala has the end of a dry spell to celebrate. She’s also decided to focus on friends, family and sober living. In much the same way that NA Prosecco is refreshing but often misunderstood, Lala might not be for every palate, but she doesn’t need alcohol to have a good time. Also, you can happily hang out with her for hours without having to worry about a hangover.
Sober curious? Start here:
- The 11 Best Non-Alcoholic Spirits to Try
- The 15 Best Non-Alcoholic Wines, According to Customer Reviews
- Non-Alcoholic Apertif Spritz Recipe
Lisa Vanderpump and Rosé
The matriarch of Vanderpump Rules is the owner of Sur, where lots of the show’s drama goes down. Lisa and husband Ken spill major tea this season and are the ones to drop the bomb that Raquel stayed over at Tom’s house, a key piece to the larger Scandoval puzzle. Lisa loves a good floral moment (we’re thinking of all the beautiful bouquets that arrived at Ariana’s house after the affair leaked), plus she has a great passion for the color pink, which she manages to work into most of her outfits. (A noted exception to the pink rule: Her all-black moment when Tom came over to sob. Boo hoo.) Lisa even has her own rosé brand, so naturally she’s a shoe-in for a blush pour.
Rosés our reviewers are loving right now:
- Hearst Ranch 2022 Julia Rosé (Paso Robles), 92 Points. Buy here.
- Barnard Griffin 2021 Sangiovese Rosé (Columbia Valley, WA), 90 Points. Buy here.
- Breca 2021 Rosé (Spain), 90 Points. Buy here.
Raquel Leviss and Wine Spritzer
Shocker of shockers, Raquel (or Rachel, as she is now known to the world) is the absolute villainess of this season. Like Raquel, wine spritzers are stereotypically not made with the best-quality grapes, so tread carefully.
Wine spritzers we’re drinking right now:
Scheana Shay and Moscato d’Asti
Scheana Shay, Ariana’s forever best friend, reminds us of a bottle of Moscato d’Asti. Light, charming, bubbly and sweet as a honeysuckle, she’s best served chilled because when heated (like when you cross her friends), she’ll mess you up.
Moscatos our reviewers are loving right now:
- Saracco 2021 Moscato d’Asti, 95 Points. Buy here.
- Michele Chiarlo 2020 Nivole (Moscato d’Asti), 92 Points. Buy here.
- Marenco 2020 Strevi Scrapona (Moscato d’Asti), 94 Points. Buy here.
Tom Sandoval and Pinot Noir
The darkest villain of all. Even with his well-known white nail polish (which has women swearing they’ll never wear it again), he remains a dark presence in the Vanderpump universe. Tom is clearly a Pinot Noir, rarely available in its white form, unpredictable and fragile. But, it’s capable of making you feel a wide spectrum of things.
Pinot Noirs our reviewers are loving right now:
- Ken Wright 2021 Shea Vineyard Pinot Noir (Yamhill-Carlton), 96 Points. Buy here.
- Samsara 2020 Pinot Noir (Sta. Rita Hills), 94 Points. Buy here.
- Siduri 2021 Pinot Noir (Russian River Valley), 94 Points. Buy here.
Tom Schwartz and Pinot Grigio
Tom Schwartz, the ex of Katie Maloney, likes to play innocent amid the Scandoval drama. He is Sandoval’s business partner, currently single and ready to mingle. Schwartz’s easygoing personality made him a favorite of fans and cast members alike, at least until now. Complexity is not in his DNA and neither is depth; he’s what we’d describe as basic. With that in mind, Tom Schwartz is a nicely chilled, simple Pinot Grigio. If raised right, it can be divine. Otherwise, it’s just a tad lackluster—unlike some of the stellar ones below.
Pinot Grigios our reviewers are loving right now:
- Handley 2021 Pinot Gris (Anderson Valley), 92 Points. Buy here.
- Portlandia 2021 Pinot Gris (Washington-Oregon), 91 Points. Buy here.
- Tiefenbrunner 2021 Turmhof Pinot Grigio Pinot Grigio (Alto Adige), 92 Points. Buy here.